ff

First of all, you definitely need to have a good leg in order to kick some ass.

Cold jokes a side, what does a marketer really need to know/learn in order to be one helluva kick-ass marketer?

Let me start by being very long-winded and a nag. Back in the old days when we are living in a civilization when kids are still playing hopscotch with no Nintendo or gameboy to play, marketers do not have many options but to do advertising and promotion work through what is now known as the traditional media. Some may call it above the line.

Back then, the paper press business was booming, TV and radio stations are the other alternate media. So it was really a battle of money to see who have more money to throw in the papers, TV and radios.

All of a sudden came the internet boom which fueled the US economy back in the late 1990s. Useless websites with no solid business models were being invested by venture capitalists just because they are afraid to miss the boat.

Of course when the bubble grows too big, either you add more soap to sustain or it will burst.

The rest was history. Many tech setups failed and people were afraid to venture back into tech companies. Because they haven’t yet discover the true potential of the online media.

Why is this so? We can narrow this to a few reasons. [1] Internet penetration around the world was slow. In fact, don’t even mention about internet, computer owners were few. Imagine back in those days you pay about $5,000 just to get a PC. [2] Internet connection was at 56k. Too slow to surf heavy websites. [3] Limited talent pool to brainstorm and develop cool websites.

All these changed after 2000. The talent pool became bigger with skills and ideas galore. Introduction of Dell probably helped bring down PC prices to reasonable level, thus insuring more people own a computer at home. With that comes government support to improve their internet infrastructure.

With people getting richer, electronic merchandise getting cheaper, uber good infrastructure which was beyond our needs (think 3G’s lukewarm consumer response when it was first launched), and talents with vision and skills, technology just keeps improving exponentially.

Ideas like Friendster, Wholivesnearyou, Facebook brought networking and your social life to another level. At the same time, they became the online media’s mainstay, at least for awhile for a few of them.

Marketers suddenly have a whole range of options to tap into. The online media promises more eyeballs, more capabilities to track, and more ways to capture attention.

But it seems that universities are just still teaching concepts. The big idea of how marketing is like. The fundamentals are good. Not that I’m complaining that fundamentals are not important, but I strongly believe in this information age, marketers also need to equip themselves with the technologies of the present day.

- = [ 1] = – The Techie Marketer

With Facebook, Twitter and iPhone, Android and Google running so intertwined to our live, these few new media provides the marketer more ammo in their arsenal to launch their next big assault. The biggest plus? It’s much more affordable than traditional media.

Some marketers may say, “Oh yes I do have a fan page on Facebook, a Twitter account, etc”, the next question is how involved are your fans/followers with your pages?

Marketers may just want to check off their list of things to do by merely creating a page and hope it runs by itself. Certainly more effort is needed. Think acquisition of more fans (Look at Cheers Singapore, Starhub, JobsCentral).

Online banners are good also but will heavily depend on what is shown to the fish. Yes, I call the surfers a fish and your banners a bait. It needs to appeal to the fish in order of the fish to eat the bait, which for this case is the click on the banner.

Knowing Singaporean culture, your copy will need to be some sort of “Win an iPad”, “Win this, win that”, “$5,000 cash!”, etc. Something along this line. Of course you don’t want to learn from scam artist and make your copy sound like a scam.

- = [ 2 ] = – The Copywriter Marketer

I cannot say how important the copywriting needs to be. It is like the mini salesperson who can just bring in that deal in without a real salesperson doing all the psycho-ing.

I always believe the first few words will determine whether you capture alot of audience or not. Followed by how you frame your content to shout out loud but not too loud on why you should use us.

Internet marketers commonly use historical results to prove the success for the product/service they are marketing. Testimonials from people whom have used their products/services (I always doubt the testimonials are real. =x). Table comparison with competitors. And also the super discount they always declare at the bottom of the page vs the real value of the product/service.

For known brands, they often want to keep a certain distinct style of writing to maintain their brand positioning. I can only say, if the copywriting style is inline with the positioning, and after several attempts the money is still not showing in the bank, I probably think the positioning is not working for that product/service.

Now the marketer head honcho needs to rethink of a new positioning.

- = [ 3 ] = – The Designer Marketer

You don’t have to carry Gucci or Prada to be called a designer marketer. You will probably be called a rich marketer.  Ever since Apple created products which are so aesthetically beautiful, I have always feel that any products or marketing endeavor needs to be aesthetically beautiful too.

So if the marketer have a pair of keen eyes for designs, it will be great as the marketer to strategically plan where to throw in the words, what image to use, what colour combination to use, etc. Because we often forget that designers design things, and not all designers can value add by providing that strategic element in designing. Fortunately for my company I know such designers exist.

Thankfully for them I don’t have to think of colours as I’m colourblind. Yes, I can differentiate between purple and blue, green and brown.

- = [ 4 ] = – The Trendy Marketer

No, not those kind who are on top of the fashion trend. They can probably market themselves better if they are on top of the fashion trend. Erm, ya… if they are working in the fashion industry, then they probably can do a better job too.

I’m suggesting more of how things are trending in the market. Like technology trends. Because technologies mature and spinoff so fast nowadays, the marketer will need to know what’s gonna be the next big thing and start budgeting for that new media. ie Mobile Marketing.

Clueless people will ask how do they get on top of the trend. Just like how you read fashion magazines to know whether to buy floral dresses or aviator sunglasses, you need to read up on technology blogs and the likes.

Don’t be lazy, just do a search on google and your answer is there. Rememeber, we are in an information age already. Wait, I think we have long passed that age. Now is more like information-overloaded age.

No interest in that particular segment? Then I think if you don’t even have a basic interest on something related to your work, then there’s probably this lack of professional passion in your career. You may want to switch career.

- = [ 5 ] = – The Gorilla Marketer

Oops! I meant to say the guerilla marketer. Always been a fanboy for guerilla marketing

The concept of guerrilla marketing was invented as an unconventional system of promotions that relies on time, energy and imagination rather than a big marketing budget. Typically, guerrilla marketing campaigns are unexpected and unconventional; potentially interactive;^[1]and consumers are targeted in unexpected places.^[2] The objective of guerrilla marketing is to create a unique, engaging and thought-provoking concept to generate buzz, and consequently turn viral -quoted from Wikipedia

Nowadays it is always about viral viral viral. With Facebook being the mainstay for the next few years, things will and should go viral with people sharing content so freely.

People now talk about the next big thing after Facebook. With Facebook being the top surfed website in the world, I doubt the next big thing will arrive in the next 5 years. And if it does arrive, it cannot take away the sharing habit of humans which Facebook have instilled in us. See now we already link it back to technology matters.

Put all 5 points together. You get my dream kick-ass marketer.

You know sometimes you receive this ‘red bomb’ from your good friends, colleagues, or anyone else whom you may know, then you think to yourself: “Oh No! How much should I give??! I dun wana give too little nor too much…”

From what I know, other cultures practice giving gifts, and Singaporeans practice giving red packets. Which is probably more useful to help subsidize the dinner.

At this age, I was expecting more friends to get married and getting more invitations coming in. But surprisingly, I’m hearing more break ups and complicated relationship status (thanks to Facebook and Friendster for popularizing this status) over the past 6 months or so.

Let’s see… I’ve this fellow who’s in a complicated relationship, a couple of people I know filing divorces, tonnes of people breaking up… This brings a total number of about 10 less than successful pairing.

Now don’t blame me for knowing them! Some people probably say I bring bad aura! Hahaha!

In any case, a couple of people I know are getting married, with one of them facebooking the proposal moments. Absolutely touching when I saw the photographs. Now I find it an absolute must to capture such moments. I better start knowing friends with imba photography skills. Oh wait, I do know of such people. So that’s one thing off my list of To-Do.

Other than that couple of friends who are getting married, I found on Facebook that one of my close buddy is also getting married! Congrats to Zhifeng and Michelle!

With that, I shall end off with this Ang Pow Calculator for you to estimate how much you should give for wedding dinners.

I’m attempting to compile a list of commonly used acronym over the internet in non-alphabetical order. You may have already heard most of them, hopefully this entry will teach you new short forms.

Do let me know if I missed out any!

FML: F**k My Life. Typically used when people felt they got into shit

FTW: Last time known as F**k the World, but now more commonly used as For The Win to describe enthusiasm

TBH: To Be Honest

BTH: Buay Ta Han. Singaporean’s way of saying can’t stand it or can’t tolerate it

/o\ imagine “o” as the person’s head and the slashes as the arms.. kinda like a pull hair emoticon

\o/ then of course there’s the hurray emoticon

Woot: originated from an online game. people use to say “Wow, found loot”, so they cut it short and it is now commonly known as w00t!

GG: Good Game. Often used while gaming with other human competitors. Usually used nearing the end of the game when the winner is almost decided.

HF: Have Fun

GL: Good Luck

TC: Take Care

TTYL: Talk To You Later

BTW: By The Way

WTH: What The Hell

WTF: What The F**k

OTW: On The Way

_|_ Symbolizes pointing the middle finger at someone. Doesn’t matter it is right or left hand.

XOXO: is not eXtensible Open XHTML Outlines. Too techie for humans to understand. It actually means Hugs and Kisses. Don’t ask me how they derive it.

<3 It’s a heart/love shape! Try it on Facebook.

</3 Broken hearted =(

TIA: Thanks In Advance

CMI: Cannot Make It

ROFL: Rolling On the Floor Laughing

LOL: Laugh Out Loud

XD: Just another stupid laughing face

IRL: In Real Life

Sexting: Texting/SMS-ing with sexual connotation in the content

When mobile phone was first developed, it was the size of an iPad. Just kidding. But it was indeed big and bulky. As it became smaller and smaller with more stable technology, some phone makers decided to make it smarter with palm leading the one.

Back then, computer and internet penetration was at its highest growth potential, which is why hackers and virus creators start surfacing with wonderful applications to screw our computer.

Stealing our data was another thing. Like passwords, credit card number, etc.

Antivirus developers are you reading in?

Everyday more and more people are adopting a certain smartphone, be it iPhone, Android, Nokia’s Symbian, Microsoft’s Windows Mobile, or Samsung’s Bada.

With more and more social apps being developed for mobile devices, people just love to stay connected with their friends, make new friends, or simply to just get information at their finger tip.

Depending on which operating system have more market reach in the future, hackers and virus creators will surely think of playing a prank on us.

What could happen? Maybe they will send out nonse,nse emails, tweet rubbish, steal your mobile banking password, steal your credit card information, delete all your contact, make random overseas phone call to surprise you with a $500 bill at the end of the month. Wow! The possibility is unlimited!

Let’s hope i’m wrong. If i’m right, let’s hope antivirus developers produce something for our smart phone. The cost of owning a smart phone has just increased. ie, the recent security issue regarding iPad

That’s why the saying goes, new solutions creates new problems which in turn needs new solutions to solve.

Isn’t the world of commerce amazing?

Week 1: Where it all begins

Yes, I admit that I’ve been drinking more than usual over the past 4 weeks. I can safely sum up that the last 4 weeks worth of alcohol which touched my tongue, into my gullet, burnt my stomach, filtered by my poor liver and finally out to the toilet (which is then later being reprocessed as NEWater) is probably more than all the alcohol I have drank over the past 4 years.

#1, I’m not alocholic

#2, I’m not depressed

#3, Not because I’m recently single so I’m drinking to forget

It all started on the eve eve of my birthday when I celebrated my birthday with Ron and Parinya at OverEasy for a few drinks.

And on the eve of my birthday, I was with 7 beautiful ladies and 2 hunks at Helipad. What a waste, most of them are attached.

I got wasted so badly that I did crazy things. Was told by my good mates that I almost send out nonsense messages. Well, I did send out a couple to Parinya.

Fortunately, I didn’t send weird messages when my intern sms-ed me.

When I woke up the next day, I checked my sms and was surprised that I could send such well-composed messages to a few people even though I’m drunk! Apparently, my good mates, Esther, Jaclyn and Cindy helped me filter.

Talking about sending wrong things, I found out that this is very normal! I know of people who send:

Are you lonely tonight?

to his ex-girlfriends! And one of them was actually with her then-boyfriend! (GG!). I wonder are they still attached or not. Hurhurhur…

Some even made phone calls to their ex. But can’t recall what they conversed about.

<insert image of Keith drunk with plastic bag covering his head>

There’s 3 things which I can’t remember.

1. When did I sign my credit card
2. How did I remove my contact lens
3. And the third thing, I can’t remember what I can’t remember. (Anyone here remembered what’s the third thing which I missed out?)

I found a receipt in my wallet, and realised I can still sign even though I’m drunk. Amazing!

Week 2: Blooie’s @ Railway Mall

So jio-ed out by two girls to go for a drink. Never knew there’s a hang out spot at Railway Mall. Only thought there’s only Holland Village for the west residents.

Looks like a box of condom right? Haha. It’s not!!!

It’s actually Pepp. Tablets which supposedly helps you stay more alert after a few drinks. Doesn’t help that it was placed just on top of the many condom brands at 7-11.

Matters of the heart for one of the girls, and because I’m such a good friend. I accompanied them to bring joy and laughter. =P

Week 3: The day I almost got a blow job!

Was so bored and just nice one of my female friends asked me out for a drink. We went to Harry’s at Novena Square.

Already I was in the midst of thinking of composing my next ‘dirty’ entry. Like what sort of title I should use. I flipped the menu hoping there was some erotic naming beverage. Lo and Behold, I saw blow job and orgasm! Wanted to order but it seems a bit expensive. I think I can get cheaper blow job and orgasm elsewhere.

Week 4: Timbre@SubStation and Tanjong Beach Club

Hanged out with the lovely interns and my beloved designers and tech folks at Timbre at the eve of Buddha’s birthday.

I drank one Singapore Sling, one Stout (it doesn’t taste that bad), and one quarter a Carlsberg bottle. Why one quarter? Because our dear Miss LPY only drank half so Little Prince of Timbre and I drank each drank half of the remaining half.

And on Buddha’s birthday, hanged out with a few of my friends at Tanjong Beach Club’s soft launch. Quite a nice hang out.

Yes! Dawn Yang was there too! Won’t have spotted her if not for Zeli’s sharp eagle eye!

Every drinking party comes with drinking games, so we “guessed fist” among the 6 of us. Xueli totally pawned me but she was merciful not to pawn me 3 consecutive times, else the loser will need to finish the whole glass.

With some luck, I made Danny drink 6 consecutive times! So he ended up finishing the full glass twice!

And how can I miss out on my Truth or Dare “social killer” app? Something not to play with unless you are game enough and for females, you need to be a fearless fun female.

Lu still thinks it’s rigged because his name was always selected by my Android.

A theme every month

There seems to be a recurring theme every month. Like for the month of May, it’s an Alcohol month. In June I’ll be heading to Malaysia quite a few times over the weekend to eat and eat. Next stop, 26 June Durian Trip!!

I think next month I’ll having the “meet old friends”-themed month. So many people I want to meet after such a long time!

Ever wondered how different gays are from normal people? Like in terms of behavior, culture, activities, etc. I have the privilege to ‘interview’ a gay friend, and with his generous insights, he has given me the permission to post this blog entry to help educate the public.

When and how did you realised you are a gay?

I realised I was interested in the same gender when I was in primary school. You know when there’s nurses coming in to do body check, I was particularly excited.

After entering secondary school and with the coming of internet, information are more easily attained, and then I became more aware of my preference. You know, on sites like Trevvy.

So did you get a boner during those days when the nurses visited?

Hmmm, I guess no. Still too young ba.

How was life in secondary school like since you were from an all guys school? Must be a haven for you!

Actually I felt compelled to find a girlfriend, because everyone around me were attached to a girlfriend.

But soon after I enter JC, I got romantically involved with a few other guys.

Does your parents know about you being gay?

Yes. I told them before I entered NS. Initially, my parents were a bit concerned and we were quite awkward with each other as we didn’t know how to react and deal with my preference.

I was expecting my mum to be more accepting, but it didn’t turn out that way. Surprisingly, my dad and I became closer with each other. We even went on a trip together.

Tell us some gay jargons.

In the past gays are internally known as AJ. Now we call ourselves PLU, which stands for People Like Us.

Is there any particular hot spots which gays love hang out at?

Public toilets like at Clementi MRT Station. Swimming pools and gyms. Last time PLU use to hang out at Raffles City by the railings near the toilets.

You will notice some people hanging around the urinal like 15 minutes or so, or even spending a long time in front of mirror. They are just waiting for other PLU is pick them up and have casual sex.

Once I went to this popular gym in town. It’s like a super PLU hang out! When I was showering, this guy just suddenly open my curtain. So aggressive these testosterone-filled PLUs!

I once heard from another gay friend that gays will actually know another gay when they see one. Is there any truth to it?

Yeah, kinda. We call it Gay-dar, like radar.

Have you ever had sex?

Of course!

How is it like? Do you all take turns to.. erm.. poke each other?

Haha! There’s 3 types. Top, bottom, flex. I think you can picture this out yourself.

Hmmm.. Okay.. So which one are you?

Wow! This is the first time a straight person asked me. I’m flex.

There are some people who actually die die want to poke and yet do not want to be poked.

All these poking sounds painful. I mean, unlike woman, guys don’t get wet.

Got lub(rication) ma! And of course when you are still “virgin”, the first few times will be painful.

Ever thought of getting married overseas?

Nope. Prefer Singapore. It’s not necessary to get that piece of paper at all. Maybe just a throw a party to celebrate the ‘marriage’.

Ever thought of changing gender before?

Nooo! There’s a big misunderstanding between gays and transgender. Gays just have preference for a same gender while transgender people think they are a woman that is stuck in a guy’s body.

How much do you agree with this common saying “Good men are either married or are gay”?

Very much.

Actually I don’t agree. Because I’m not married and am straight.

Microsoft have been dominating the tech world for quite a long time. However, their dominance seems to be coming to an end soon, according to this blogger that is.

Key products like:

1. Operating System (Windows XP, Windows Vista, Windows 7)
2. Microsoft Office
3. Internet Explorer

And others which I may have forget, have helped Microsoft dominate a large portion of the world. But these products which was seemingly unchallenged over the past few years seem to be meeting their match in the form of other tech giants.

Let’s talk about Internet Explorer.

I agree that many people are still using IE, but I dare say the take up rate for alternative browsers (Firefox, Chrome, Safari, Opera) are increasing by the day. These browsers provide better security and loads pages faster than IE. It is no wonder more users are switching over.

One of my friend even said this, “IE is only useful for downloading Firefox”. Seriously speaking, I’m a Chrome user on my home computer and a Firefox user for my work computer. The loading of both browsers itself is much faster than IE. Creating a new tab is also much faster.

We now live in an instant noodle society, where everything needs to be fast and best if it’s almost instant! Lesser people are patient enough to wait for the IE to load. Plus, with OpenNet coming up that promises super fast connectivity, why do we want to limit our online experience with a slow product?

That being said, I see the world  moving towards these alternative browsers as Microsoft deals with anti-competition act in Europe for their browsers.

Did you know there’s a Mobile OS called Windows Mobile?

I’m sure most of you know. It came out earlier than Android but have yet to take off as fast as Android.

They probably didn’t foresee the app market like Google did. Android OS over Windows Mobile OS for me. Definitely.

How about Xbox?

Not a big fan of Xbox. But I think most would agree with me that they will choose either a PSP or PS3 or Wii over an Xbox.

Why must we always wait for 1 to 3 minutes for your computer to boot up?

TV used to be like this too. But within years, the smart ass engineers are able to make TV boot up instantly.

So why does computer have to boot up so slowly? That’s the question the Google engineers asked. With that question in hand, they came out with a solution, Chrome OS.

It is meant for Netbooks which are running on slower and cheaper processor. And promises computers to be booted up almost instantly like TV. It’s poised to be released some time late this year!

Imagine if they can boot up instantly on a slower processor, how much faster can our more powerful processor boot up? If the product goes well, on the netbook, I got a feeling Google is going to bring it up to another level to eat into Microsoft’s OS pie.

Keen on Kin?

Microsoft came out with a new phone called Kin. There’s Kin One (the rounder one) and Kin Two (the more rectangular one).

I dunno how they are gonna pit against iPhone and Android phones. Then again, I think alot of users now won’t want to settle for anything less if the phone OS does not have a “market” to buy apps from.

Maybe another not successful product against world class products like iPhone and Android.

Mp3 Player: Zune

Will you get an iPod, Creative or Zune? Definitely either an iPod or Creative for me. iPod for its sexiness and Creative for being supportive to Singapore product!

With products that does not seem to be holding well by itself, it seems that Microsoft are just contend in creating products to nibble a small piece of the pie. And if it wasn’t for the Microsoft brand backing, those product may not have hold so well.

Think they should start hiring a world class product team to beat the competition, or else I think the end might be waiting for this matured tech company.

Already Apple shares have overtook Microsoft as the biggest tech company in terms of market capitalization recently.

So what’s the other Steve waiting for?

Imagine you’re out having lunch with the sun shining so brightly and cheerfully at you while you are sweating like hell. Patches of “islands” forming on your clothing as you lumber your way to eat/office.

Not that hard to imagine right? ** Got distracted while composing this post. Was playing Cheer’s word churner game. I did 19 words with the word HYPERTENSION**

Yeah, it should not be hard imagining the hot day ya? Since we are like living in Singapore. Which kinda shames the song ‘Heaven is a place on Earth’. It’s more like Hell is a place called Singapore.

Usually people think of getting an ice cream, hide in air-con places, or drink some cold beverage. How about trying grabbing a Froyo instead?!

By definition, froyo is actually a frozen yogurt. Haven’t seen that in Singapore yet. Oh yah, did I mention before that I realised Frolick’s girls are mostly quite good lookers?

So I was wondering, why does Google name their latest Android OS version 2.2 as Froyo.

Actually for those who didn’t know, most of their versions are named after yummy snacks like CupCake (1.5), Donut (1.6), Eclair (2.1). And now the latest 2.2 is affectionately known as the yummy Froyo!

Folks from TechCrunch went to Google HQ to take a shot of the yet to unveil Froyo Sculpture.

You may realised one thing about these versions. They are in alphabetical order! C-upcake, D-onut, E-clair, F-royo.  Guess what? The next version is called Gingerbread. Which reminds me of the gingerbread man in Shrek. So adorable.

What’s installed for us in Android 2.2? Let’s see what Google’s official video has to say.

Gingerbread will target to launch in Q4 2010. Which is pretty soon.

There are currently like 54 handsets around the world operating on Android, and the Android market have got more than 50,000 apps as informed by Google during I/O.

Seems like the handphone OS competition is beginning to heat up with 6 players, Blackberry, Windows Mobile, iPhone, Android, Bada (by Samsung), Ovi Store (Symbian by Nokia). Seems like Microsoft, Samsung and Nokia have alot of catching up to do.

*Psss, heard from an insider that Bada apps are easier to develop and runs like an iPhone OS*

Then again, I only see it appearing on Samsung phones, which will make it harder for them to dominate the market. Unlike the leverage which Android is getting.

According to NPD Group’s smartphone survey for the first quarter of 2010 in USA, Blackberry sold about 36% of the sales, followed by 28% Android, and iPhone’s 21%.

If we were to scrutinise the information, we can probably think of a few reasons like:

1. Most users already have iPhone, that’s why lesser sales from iPhone
2. People are waiting for iPhone 4G to come out
3. Android is still new, so everyone is trying it out

No matter what the reasons may be, there’s one thing for sure,  Android is here to stay.

Many handset makers are slowly adopting Android. From HTC, to Sony Ericsson, to Samsung, etc.

Like back in the old days, when car was first invented, it makes sense to mass produce the same model due to economics of scale. As time passes people no longer want to have the same car like others.

Same for the iPhone. It’s their OS and cut-edge technology which made them the darling of many. However, with Google always trying to reinvent the wheel and sticking their nose into many businesses, I would say they have made the right move to make Android open source. This allowed many developers to play with it, thus aiding in speedier developments and of course keep the core while appearing different.

Android being open source means handset makers can just pick it up for free and make their own modifications, thus saving them on creating another OS.

This has helped Android to rise above all expectations, even Google’s own expectation.

On the other hand, with China trying to keep costs low and to make themselves less of a pirate hub with iPhone lookalikes, handset makers like China Unicom have also begin to adopt Android. This will surely help Android slowly/quickly expand into the China market. Although I think the default search engine will probably not be Google since they have already exited China.

At this point in time, iPhone’s App Store have about 200,000+ apps, while Android Market have about 38,000+. Although that’s about 5.5 times smaller than iPhone, surely as more Androids are being sold, more apps will appear.

Already Venture Capitalists from USA are receiving pitches about building Android apps.

So if you’re still thinking of building only on iPhone, you may want to rethink again and have a look at Android.